I make this mistake where I reflect too much on the past. I sit for what seems like hours missing things, wishing to rewind time; trying so hard to make sense of things I can no longer control. I try to find meaning to things that have no significance on my life anymore. And I wonder if we are maybe not meant to know the reasons why sometimes. I struggle to wrap my brain around the idea that there are some things that I will just never know.
Sometimes people make choices or mistakes that hurt us. And that’s ok. It’s ok to be hurt for a little while. But if we choose to sit in those memories, if we choose to try to remain in those moments, the pain and hurt that we feel is no longer anyone’s fault but our own.
A very smart friend reminded me that: I need to focus on building my future; that the train that is my life is moving quickly and I need to build the tracks in front of me so I can move forward.
‘Man can learn nothing except by going from the known to the unknown.’
‘Often, it’s not about becoming a new person, but becoming the person you were meant to be, and already are, but don’t know how to be.’
Do not seek the approval of those who are unkind to you. ‘Surround yourself with people who respect and treat you well.’ Take steps forward. Create a new world. Trust in yourself. Be changed by what happens to you, but refuse to be reduced by it. Live in the present and prepare and work for the future.
Reflect for small moments. Don’t waste your beautiful energy trying to make sense of things that aren’t apart of your world anymore.
I’ve made that mistake. No. I make that mistake, daily. I’ve been there; in fact I’m there now. I’m there inside those old moments hurting, hating nostalgia. Wishing so badly that I would have done something differently. Taking all the blame for something that was, and is still, out of my control.
There is a beautiful life outside that window that we need to be open to. Believe that everything does happen for a reason. And if that’s too much to believe, at least allow yourself to learn form experiences. Trust life. The universe will guide you if you remain vulnerable to it.